Posts Tagged Partners

Finding Friends and Stalking Spouses

the oneI have a friend who struggles to meet the “one.” The truth is, husband hunting is a tricky business. I’d guess this is also true for those seeking a wife, but I can’t speak to that experience.  I told my last admirer straight up that I wasn’t interested in dating, I cut to the chase, told him I was looking for a husband. He laughed. Three years later we got married.

I warned him.

Meeting the right person means being in the right place. Unless you make eyes across the conference room table at work, stake out the vegetable bins in the market, or collide on a morning run through the park, you’ve got to put yourself out there somehow. Figure out what you enjoy. Find people who like the things you do. You don’t have to be identical twins in your tastes, but having some common ground is a good start. If you don’t have much opportunity to meet strangers, there’s your first step.

Mr Wonderful

Mr. Wonderful is not going to ring the doorbell and if by some cosmic coincidence he did, you’d be lounging on the sofa in your grungy sweats, surrounded by crushed Pringles cans and empty Ben & Jerry’s ice cream containers. You know it’s true. Stretch your wings. Dip a toe in the deep end. Try something new. Celebrate a little danger in your life. Make the effort to meet a new friend and something might bloom in the garden. I’m not talking about weeds either. Here are some ideas to get things moving:

1. Release the inner artist. Check out the local Parks & Recreation and learn how to do something entirely new: sew a quilt, oil paint a portrait, knit some socks, draw a live nude model….BE a live nude model. This is a great way to meet people in your comunity and try something fun.

2. Sign-up for a cooking class. Maybe two! You’ll not only spend a small fortune on excellent tools (All-Clad rocks!) but at the conclusion you’ll be able to impress all and sundry with your epicurean talents.

3. Take up a new athletic study. Try on a martial art, experiment with archery, try your hand at swinging a sword, visit a gun range for some target shooting, grab a dance partner and learn how to tango. Mix it up – remember you’re stretching your comfort zone.

4. Immerse yourself in another language. Post-it note your house to acquire necessary vocabulary and search out someone to practice conversation (use common sense with craigslist). When you’ve learned 100 words – visit your chosen locale and try them out.

5. Challenge others to help you meet people. Organize a monthly BBQ and rotate from house-to-house. Plan an annual yard sale event and heave-ho the baggage of your past. Host a no-holds-barred weekend blitz for yourself – go somewhere wild. Live.

Be daring, but know this now…I take no responsibility for your poor choices. Relationship advice will not be forthcoming. My only suggestion…never bail anyone out of jail. It’s expensive. Let them stew and maybe they’ll be less likely to go out for round two of whatever mischief landed them in the hoosegow. You also might want to measure the healthy factor in that relationship. Just saying. No one wants to see their friends on talk-show-television.

question markWhat’s the 911 on how you met your significant other? What’s the backstory with you and your BFF? Spill the beans and tell us how you hooked up with your thick-as-thieves posse…

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